Hucksters

These Palins sure are some Hucksters. The daughter with the baby is charging 30k for speeches!

Obama-Fingers

Maybe this will work.Slap the name of a popular President in place of a bird to create an even more confounding name for a food product that is neither finger, nor Chicken (well, processed most likely), nor Obama.

Behold the Obama Fingers! And...w/ Curry dip? Gross.

from Spiegel via American Presidents Blog

The Base

No words...just watch.

Finally!

A conservative hip-hop artist/Republican rapper.



Of course, the best part is that he became a conservative when his car stereo got stuck on the conservative talk radio station.

This Is Real Life

via F'd in Park Slope

Kid goes through the full experience in two minutes...and check it out, Florida Gators shirt...

Terrifying Flying Monster Bird Dinosaur!

The thought of that thing flying is pretty scary. Get this. Now it is believed these 500lb nightmares took flight by a quick jump, from all fours, in less than a second.

Cobra v. Baby!

Brain Foot

I guess this is real. A doctor in Denver, while operating on an infant, found a foot growing in a brain, the baby brain. One more time: foot growing in a brain. Also found in this baby brain: some intestine, a hand, a thigh, and another foot. For real.

via boingboing

Juggling Octopus

This octopus in an aquarium in Germany can juggle. It juggles hermit crabs. It short circuits the aquarium light. It tried to smash its way out with a rock. That's all for now.

McSomething

It's been about 4 years since I last had food from McDonalds. Things have really changed.



Check out 2:49-2:59 in the video.

Happy Weekend

America is Still an Old White Man

It's true, if you were to assign a type of person to each nation of the world, America would be an old white man. As you may have noticed, the "fist bump" has become a "new" cultural phenomenon. Here's a boring story about how the fist bump is making its way through the business world.

Of course the meteoric rise of the fist bump can be traced back to an on-air FOX News reader mouthing the words of some douche-news writer's attempt to portray Barack Obama and his wife's public greeting as some sort of symbol of sympathy with Islamic terrorists.

After the "terrorist fist jab" flap the origins of the fist bump were researched and pontificated upon by people who shouldn't be talking about it. I remember reading a story somewhere about the difference between "dap" and a fist bump, as well as the geographic variations of the term for touching fists.



Is that Bush "teaching" a little terrorist boy about "dap"? Probably, yes.

Silly Ass Metallica

Last November, I posted a rather scathing review of the concept for the video game Rock Band without having even played it, or it's precursor Guitar Hero. This Spring I was able to spend some hours over a couple of days rockin' out and downin' brews and actually found the game to be pretty fun. The concept still sort of creeps me out a little, but I'll concede it is fun.

Butttttttttt..........

This is stupid,

Metallica's new album, titled DEATH MAGNET! will be available for download to the Rock Band universe immediately upon its official label release.

I officially declare Metallica to be a silly-ass band.

Fans Lost Control

According to a BBC article, the gravestone of Ian Curtis (ya know…Joy Division frontman, low voice, epileptic, hanged himself) was stolen. Yes, it was stolen. By whom? Nobody the fuck knows. Why? Nobody the fuck knows. So seriously, guys, we all love Ian Curtis. Yes he is worth listening to as you fall asleep every night crying lonely and miserable tears, but is it worthwhile to steal his gravestone?? Go buy a vinyl copy of Closer to satisfy your selfish hearts.

A Governor and an Exorcist

The Governor of Louisiana is a young (37), eloquent and smart politician. Much like Barack Obama, he is relatively new to the political scene but has had a lot of success. Many people have called for John McCain to choose Jindal as his running mate.

My opinion: He would be an excellent choice, exolent!

Governor Jindal is a crazy devout Catholic, and by crazy I mean he has participated in an exorcism...

AN EXORCISM!!!!?!!!?!

This isn't a new story, in fact I heard about it a while back but I just watched the Governor speaking in an interview on the t.v. and his talking about what the people want in a President got me to thinking about what I don't want in a Vice-President: first and foremost no one who believes he has exorcised a demon from a human being. (By the way we've already had an Attorney General who anointed himself with holy oil and substituted Crisco when the good stuff wasn't available)

In the past Jindal's political campaigns have been successful at portraying questions about his religious past as attacks on his religious beliefs. I think it is fair to attack the belief that demons can enter someone's body and then can be exorcised from the person through a variety of ritualistic activities and a shit-load of prayer.

Rapture + Internets = Funny

Check out youvebeenleftbehind your one stop online shop to notify your friends when Jesus comes back and takes you to heaven leaving all your heathen friends and family behind to wonder where the hell you went.

Here's how it works. You pay 40 bucks or so and you get a little online space to store documents (presumably letters to people in your life). Also, you can set up an email message to over 50 email addresses to let people know that your kissing Jesus' pinky ring while they are sitting at work checking their email and reading their friends' cool blogs. The system is automatically triggered when 3 of the 5 designated "team members" fail to log into the system for three days. Then, three more days will pass just to make sure there isn't any funny business. So, 6 days after the rapture your designated recipients will receive an email from you bragging that you were not left behind like their sorry asses.

F@ck It! F#ck It!

REMIX!

Attack the Emos?!?

There seems to be some sort of wave of anti-Emo violence in Mexico City. The story sounds made up but seems to actually be true. Apaprently, the attacks are being partially blamed on a local television personality named Kristoff (really) who had said some things about "emo kids" that were more or less homophobic. Kristoff has since denounced the violence. MTV (exists still apparently) sent some "journalists" to Mexico to speak with this Kristoff character. Here is a mind numbing criticism of the "emos",

"Emos can't define what it is to be emo music. To them, everything is emo — screamo, Joy Division, Bauhaus — so I said they confuse genres. And because most of the emos here are young girls, I said they like the group because of the lead singer. ... They said My Chemical Romance is emo, when Gerard Way said, 'I'm not emo.' Because he has black hair ... because they like him, he's emo. They classify whatever they like as emo. ... Everyone attacks me because of what I said, but nobody refutes my words."

Oh, by the way the attackers are described as metallers and punkeros.

Two Butts!

I saw two butts on Tuesday, in public, in the day light, in Park Slope. I went for a walk with my trusty dog Jack to Prospect Park on a fine Spring day and saw two separate asses. The first one occurred between Carrol St. and Garfield Pl. on Polhemus Place, a weird little block connecting Carrol and Garfield. A woman was finishing her business (peeing) on the side of the street behind a couple of garbage cans that hadn't been brought back from the street. Upon seeing her large ass she looked back at me, with no reaction and pulled up her underwear and pants. I kept walking out of fear of some sort of half naked interaction.

After a nice walk in Prospect Park we returned back home. About one block away from home, basically on the corner of 6th Ave and Berkley Place, another ass was up in my face. This time the ass was attached to a local mentally disabled man who I have seen on a few occasions. As I came around the corner I saw this man pull his pants down, make a fist, punch his butt, and announce, "Kiss my Ass!" to a young girl across the street. He then proceeded to throw a few bottles from a nearby trash can in her general direction.

So what does this all mean? I don't know. Two asses in one day a lot, no?

The History of War Told Through Food

From BoingBoingtv.

Jesus Switch

Do I really have to say anything about this? [Flickr via Giz]