Health Care Crybaby

Some doctor outside of Orlando put up a silly sign on his office door that said those who voted for Obama should look elsewhere for health care. I'm totally telling on this guy.

Take Your Kids to Work and Stun Them With a Stun-Gun Day!

Oh, the Florida Department of Corrections. This story is so indicative of your problems, and the problems throughout corrections departments all over the country. At three (3!) separate prisons a total of 43 children (!) were stunned by stun guns during take your kids to work day. A large number of the children were indirectly shocked by linking hands together, with one of the children holding the hand of someone who was directly shocked.

Non of the children were seriously hurt, luckily. All of the children were relatives of prison officials and all had permission from parents or grandparents to get shocked.

All of this is pretty insignificant compared to the more serious issues of brutality, corruption, and secrecy infecting the prison industrial complex. Many of these prisons become the major economic force of small, rural towns and many members of single families end up working within the prison in some capacity. This can create an insulated community so wrapped up in perverse power dynamics that right and wrong are born from a pretty dark place. The fact that parents and prison officials thought it would be ok to shock children, some as young as 5(!), to me, fits right in with what I know about and have seen in action regarding the prison system and its employees.

Of course, the fault, ultimately, doesn't lie with the individuals but rather the system that sends a steady stream of offenders into cages where there every infraction, no matter how minor, is met with anger, violence, aggression and intimidation. It is, perhaps, no surprise that those very employees would see little problem with turning some of these violent tactics on their own, even for "fun"

Baseball Season Starts Tonight

4/6 edit: boo, rained out!!!!

Gainesville Gay Rights

I'm a little late on this because I don't live there anymore but Gainesville, Florida voters voted to keep an anti-discrimination law. The repeal of the law would have made it legal to fire and not hire workers based solely on the their sexual orientation. Nice job, Gators (and Gator haters).

The opponents of the law tried to claim they wanted to keep men out of women's restrooms because the law allows the transgendered to choose which bathroom to use.

So, bravo. Long Island Ice Teas from UC are on me.

Even More Drug War

Let's just get to the facts...

80 year old man in Jacksonville, FL has problems with drug dealers on his property. One night, last year, he sees a couple of dealers hanging out on his lawn. He goes out with his gun to try and scare them off (clearly not the best tactic). Turns out the dealers are actually undercover cops using his property to lure in potential buyers. The cops see the man with the gun coming towards them and shoot him to death.

That's what the War on Drugs apologists call "collateral damage".

Write-In President

The following received one write-in vote each for President in the great state of Florida.

Abstain, Against All, Alfred E. Newman, Bill Clinton, Bill O'Riely, Bill Richardson, Bobby Bowden, Bugs Bunny, May the best man win, Me, Morgan Freeman, Mr. Bill, Newt Gingwrich, None (Anarchy), Oprah, Pat Buchannan, Ralph Nader, Hilary Bush, Homer Simpson, Jay Plotkin, Jimmy Carter, Joe the Plumber, John Doe, Lieberman, Theodore Roosevelt, They Both Suck '08, Tiger Woods, Tommy Chong, Truman, Weird Al Yancovic, William Crosby and Willie Nelson

My favorite is "May the best man win".

Hillary Clinton got the most write-in votes, God got 6, and four people apparently just wrote-in "Obama".

(via Ben Smith)

Election Roundup

A bunch of states had a bunch of ballot measures. Here's some of the Good, Bad, and the Fugly.

Good
-Michigan allows medical marijuana.
-Washington allows assisted suicide for the terminally ill.
-California refuses to force doctors to notify parents of minors who want an abortion.
-Colorado rejects the premise that life begins at conception.

Bad
-Arkansas bans adoption and foster parenting by gay couples.
-California, Florida, and Arizona ban gay marriage.

Fugly
-Michelle Bachmann was somehow reelected to her Congressional seat after calling Obama anti-American on national television and then calling for media investigations into other potentially anti-American members of Congress.

Florida Man Goes Nuts After Michelle Obama Speech

Police were called in Pasco County, FL after a man apparently fired shots into the air late last night outside of his RV. According to police he was expressing some sort of displeasure with the speech given by Michelle Obama at the Democratic Convention last night. He probably is unhappy with the Obama position on health care, or maybe abortion, and certainly is not at all angered by her race.

Marijuana Deaths?

The state of Florida produced a report that looked at all of the autopsies in the state in 2007 and it produced a couple of interesting tidbits. First of all, prescription drugs killed far more people than illegal drugs. Also, not one death was attributed to marijuana.

Well, what d'ya know?

NY Times article

Jerk Professor Suing Over Lecture Notes

A professor at the University of Florida, my alma mater, is suing a company in Gainesville, Florida that hires students to take notes and then sells the notes to other students. The company being sued is Einstein's notes. I think Einstein's notes was around back in my day but I don't really recall much because I usually just got high all semester until 3 days before the exams and then bought the notes for all my classes that some nerd who went to class everyday wrote down and sold for money so he could eat or whatever. (Wink!)

When I saw this story on wired.com my immediate reaction was, "What an asshole!". But it got even better when I realized the class he "teaches" is Wildlife Issues. Wildlife Issues was one of those classes that had a reputation for being an easy class, along with other greats such as Exceptional People, Insects, and Making a Sandwich.

I never took the course but I think it was more or less an 8th grade Zoology class. It was a class you took to fulfill a requirement or because it fit into your schedule and because you knew you would get an A.

I think this guy is just pissed everybody keeps acing his easy-ass class.

Below you will find my notes for the course Making a Sandwich: Sammy or Sammich?

America is a Mall

I found this map at a very cool blog called Strange Maps. The map came from Josh Bloom and was run in the Boston Globe in 2000. I love that Walmart and McDonalds are right on top of the areas of Florida that I have spent most of my life in. Also, the more "detailed" pop out of Manhattan is appropriately Starbucks heavy.

Hello Florida! Please Teach Us About Life

The Florida Department of Education will be voting soon on a science curriculum that teaches evolution in schools. Nine of Florida's counties, Baker, Clay, Hamilton, Holmes, Jackson, Madison, St. Johns, Taylor and Washington have lodged formal complaints against the proposed curriculum claiming that the theologically based story of creationism should be taught along with the scientifically based theory of evolution. For those of you not familiar with Florida, those are the exact counties you would expect to have a problem with science.

Anyway, Florida has 64 counties, one would think the protests 9 of the more sparsely populated wouldn't have much of an effect on the school board. But, two of the board members have spoken out against evolution in the past. That's right, two of the people of the state of Florida education board may not believe in evolution!

On a related not I hear a number of other counties will soon be teaching that wine does not come from grapes but rather magic water, people can live for hundreds of years, incest does not result in serious genetic mutations in offspring, and you can easily live inside a whale, for a while at least.

Taser Fest

Xmas is over. Tasers are still hot.

Unofficial plasticblog southern correspondent Jay has sent up another nugget on taser incidents. In April of 2006, in Clay County, Florida, a wheelchair bound and schizophrenic and African American women was tased to death. The woman, who's sister called 911, was threatening her sister with two knives and a hammer. The police tased the women 10 times for just under 3 minutes resulting in her death. The medical examiner ruled the death a homicide. The attorney for the women's family summed up the absurdity of the whole situation quite succinctly,

"One, she's in a wheelchair. Two, she's schizophrenic. Three, they're using a Taser on a person that's in a wheelchair, and then four is that they tasered her 10 times for a period of like two minutes."

It should be noted that the police around the country (and beyond) seem to have made it their mission to tase people in all walks of life, across gender and race, and involving people in all states of mental well being. Just off the top of my head there has been stories of tasings of college students, a pregnant woman, white males, a black female schizophrenic in a wheelchair, the mentally ill, and a polish man. All that's left is a baby on crutches, an old man flying a kite, and Canadians.

Congress to Override Bush Water Bill Veto

President Bush vetoed a bill yesterday that authorized funding for a number of water related projects, including funds to help restore the Everglades. Bush's reason for the veto was that it is fiscally irresponsible. He apparently made no mention of the money being spent in Iraq or the deficit the country now faces despite the record surplus he inherited as President.

Members of Congress feel that an override of the veto is a forgone conclusion.

Florida State Supreme Court Upholds Lethal Injection

Despite the upcoming U.S. Supreme Court case Baze v. Rees, the Supreme Court of Florida has upheld the lethal injection death penalty procedure, rejecting the accusation that it is "cruel and unusual punishment". In Baze v. Rees the U.S. Supreme Court will be deciding whether or not lethal injection constitutes "cruel and unusual punishment" under the U.S. Constitution which would mean that the procedure could no longer be used anywhere in the United States. The U.S. Supreme Court has already granted a stay for a previously scheduled execution by lethal injection in Mississippi in lieu of their own upcoming decision.

With the new more conservative make up of the court, I have a hard time believing that they will find lethal injection to be cruel and unusual. I would expect a 7-2 decision with only Justices Ginsburg and Souter agreeing that lethal injection is cruel and unusual. In fact, I believe both Justices believe the death penalty in any form is unconstitutional.

In any case, the execution of Mark Dean Schwab is scheduled for November 15 in Florida. The Supreme Court should step in as it did before and stay the execution, I expect they will.

No One Wants to Save the Everglades

What is more important: Sugar production by big corporations (Big Sugar!) or thousands of acres of sensitive wildlife habitat, including wetlands?

According to a NY Times article funding for a project to save the Everglades from endless development and destruction is in danger of losing federal funding. It is expected that the proposal for funding will make it to Bush's desk but that he will veto the bill.

The Florida State legislature has allowed the Sugar industry to continuously pollute the sensitive land of the Everglades by postponing stronger pollution restrictions.

By the way, Republican Presidential candidate Fred Thompson has suggested he would be open to drilling for oil in the Everglades. Right on! Sugar and Oil, yee haw!